Friday, November 30, 2012

Needs Help. NOW.

***Submitted by Anonymous

I need some help and guidance and do not know where to start.  

I don't know how to start a new e-mail account that is confidential.  

But at this point I don't care.  

I just cannot keep things under control and I have a wonderful and loving husband and a beautiful wonderful daughter and grand kids but I just keep lapsing into drinking.  

It is hard for me to admit this to people who I love and also people who I work with.  

I wish it wasn't such a social stigma of bad behavior.  

I would like to post and have some support from you all.  

I have been to the website and have really felt a connection.  

Thanks for listening


  1. Brave, courageousness you. WELCOME! You are not alone. Can you anonymously get to an AA meeting near your home and start making local connections? That would help you so much. I was scared to go to AA but found such warmth and understanding there. You will find such relief by taking care of yourself and connecting with others. You have already done the most important step--admitting that things are out of control and asking for help here. We have all felt the way you feel now. You no longer have to hide and feel shame. Keep reaching out.

  2. You took the most important step by asking for support! Seek AA and a sponsor. Also, speak with your doctor if you have a doctor you feel you can trust. There are alternative treatment avenues available nowadays. I wish you the best...

  3. This is exactly how it starts. You don't have to admit it to everyone immediately. Take baby steps. You've admitted it to yourself, and to us here, and that is a big deal. Now it's time to surround yourself with as much support as you can find. Come join the BFB (link on the right over here ---> scroll down to find it) and post there (you'll make a yahoo account to join, and you can make that account private with a fake name). Tell it all. If you live with someone, tell that person, so that someone close to you will know and so you'll have accountability in your house. I would never have been able to stop if I didn't do that. You can do this, and you never have to be alone in this again. xo
    - K Telling

  4. To create a new e-mail account for this, go to and sign up for a free google gmail account. Good luck and God bless you.

  5. Welcome! You are NOT alone. The thing is, problem drinking and alcoholism affect anybody and everybody. If you go to an AA meeting you'll see the most interesting cross section of society! You may be hung up on the social stigma right now, but that will begin to go away the more you meet people who drink (or drank) like you do, and who feel like you do. I recommend going to an AA meeting. Maybe AA isn't for everybody, but for me, it's truly a life line. The people you meet there, the comfort you receive, the security in knowing you're not alone (not by a long shot)... It's worth it. Go to a few meetings and find one you feel comfortable in. THEN KEEP GOING. You can overcome this, lots of people do, and you may be able to overcome it on your own, but it's so much harder that way. AA can really help. Even if you aren't ready for a meeting, read the Alcoholics Anonymous book (also called the Big Book). You'll identify, trust me, and that is hugely comforting. Keep checking in. We're here for you.

  6. You are BRAVE for typing those words, we are HERE and can honestly say that sober doesn't suck. I go to AA, it was frightening at first thinking that people may know me.....but they are there for the same reason and it is the best thing I ever did.

  7. Realizing you need help and asking for it is a huge step in the RIGHT direction. The next is to take it one day at a time and be gentle with yourself. Problem drinking is a hard habit to break but you can do it. Stay open to all of the resources available and find the ones that work for you. Come over to the BFB if you haven't already for more support and wisdom.


  8. SO glad you asked for help...that is a HUGE step!
    Please believe that from this moment forward you never have to do this alone again...there are so many of us to help you. PLEASE join the BFB at can tell your story there and read others, and get suggestions. if you can please try an AA meeting, face-to--face contact with other sober alcoholics has been essential in my recovery. BUT...if you join the BFB and post where you live there may be someone who can go with you, and it is easier with someone else, everything is.
    You have just told your truth, you are not alone gets better, I promise!!


  9. Please know that soooo many are rooting for you! You already are moving yourself to a better place, just by reading here and posting here. It is my honor to support you as many people on this site supported me in the first frightening days...and that was more than three months ago. You can be in a place of so much more peace and sanity and joy....and you are on your way there already. Hooray for you!

  10. You are definitely not alone. There are so many of us, just like you, who have realized that drinking has become a problem. I was terrified to go to my first AA meeting, but like some other posts said, they are there for the same reason....just try to find one that you can relate to, that really helps too. I really enjoyed women's "speaker meetings", the kind of meeting where a member of AA will speak for about 20 minutes and tell their story. I stopped drinking 3 years ago and it is the BEST decision I have ever made, an incredibly hard decision for sure, but I have been so grateful for what I have gained. I am sending you courage and hope that you will give sobriety a try!

  11. Welcome!
    I can appreciate your feelings where the stigma of alcoholism is still thriving, today, 2012; this makes me both furious and frustrated. Being a woman struggling with the abuse of alcohol is doubly challenging.

    What I can tell you, though, is that once you surround yourself with life-minded individuals and build your self-confidence with each day (hour sometimes) of sober living you'll likely find yourself discussing it with whomever will hear you. And the reason for this is because we are some of the strongest, bravest, most honest people around. Its easy to stay complacently wrapped up in drinking. Its difficult to abandon that crutch and walk "through" our fears and problems.

    Finally I beg you to realize this is not something we accomplish quiety alone. We NEED other's support, those of us who are walking before you, many here who are walking along side of you, and even those who come after you. You NEED NEED NEED a network of support!!! And at some point, those who are in your immediate family need to have their own awareness and UNDERSTANDING of this disease.

    YOU ARE A LOVED, VALUED, AND WORHTY PERSON - alcoholism does not define you!! We abuse alcohol because we have the disease of addiction and THAT does not make us unworthy bad women. We just have a bad disease that often times causes us to do bad things.

    Speaker meetings are a terrific non-invasive way to become introduced to the AA program. The fellowship and support you'll find there cannot be compared to online support - they are two completely different recovery tools. Please come back and update us on where you go from here!
    Your friend in recovery, DAwn

  12. Hi there. Welcome. My heart did a double leap for you and I wanted to reach out and give you a hug! I found my way to sobriety here and you can too. You took that first huge step...good for you. No one can really do it alone - with help and support you can be sober too and feel comfort in a community of folks, and a lot of women who are right there with you. You showed strength in posting. Now take action knowing you are not alone. Please keep us posted.


  13. It's so hard, I know. I struggled forever before giving up alcohol. If it wasn't for a traumatic event, I would probably still be drinking. We are all here for you and will be praying for you. Hugs...Linda

  14. It's a huge step to start realizing that you have a problem so kudos to you for doing that! You are not alone and there is a ton of support available to you. I can tell you that if you become honest with yourself, open minded, and willing to do anything that it takes to work a good recovery program then your life will be so much better than you ever thought possible. The coolest thing about being in recovery is not the fact that I have stopped drinking but that I have learned how to live life as a good person that I am proud to be. I pray for you that you can get to that point with yourself. YOu can do this! :)