***Submitted by Searching Mom
I’m 12 days into not drinking and really could use some insights from those of you who have gone before me.
I’m mid-50s, successful professional, wife of a teacher, mom of a son and daughter. Have had scattered incidents of drinking too much for years, but really started using alcohol as a crutch in the past few years after a family trauma.
In recent months--even though, with counseling, the trauma was receding and its fallout was becoming manageable--my drinking was becoming unmanageable.
Finally, on a recent family vacation where I tried to keep pace drinking with a 20-something and totally embarrassed myself, I have admitted that I am not able to control myself if I drink at all, and concluded that I must be a non-drinker from now on.
I have talked to my wonderful (female) pastor about this, to the counselors my family still sees, and to some sober friends who are being wonderful guides.
I am asking friends about various AA meetings in my area to see if one sounds like a good fit, and in the meantime am doing reading on my own about recovery.
I am feeling such relief that I have begun this, and I think I am not kidding myself that this will be easy every day – but so far, I have generally felt calm and well able to resist drinking.
I am finding positive things to add to life now that alcohol has been subtracted – e.g., joined a gym where I can work out with a friend.
A dear friend who is 3 years sober tells me I’m on “the pink cloud” and should be prepared for this not to last, and I THINK I understand that and am prepared, at least intellectually.
But at this point, I’d really value hearing from others who have passed through some of these dynamics and can tell me what to expect and what has helped them persevere.
Thanks and godspeed.