A note from Ellie: Alcoholism impacts every single person around an addict. Knowing how to help a loved one suffering from addiction is a lonely, frightening place. I emailed this person back suggesting Al-Anon as a resource; I know many, many people who have found a safe community there. We posted this message here to let others know they aren't alone, and to encourage people who may have had similar experiences - either as an addict/alcoholic or a loved one - to reply with their own experience, strength and hope. There are no easy answers, but by talking about it openly we help break down the isolation and denial in which addiction thrives.
***Submitted by Anonymous
My 35 year old daughter has arrived at the place of full blown alcoholism. After getting sober from drugs in her twenties, she married an alcoholic that has encouraged her to drink. He likes her better that way and she can tolerate him more when she drinks.
Over a period of several years, it has evolved from a couple of beers a night for her to being intoxicated almost every evening from wine and beer. There is a lot of family conflict involving arguments, control, manipulations, and hiding the truth. The children ages nine and six are put in the position of hearing and seeing all that goes on. Little eyes and ears have take in big impressions. I have especially noticed changes in the nine year old who already stays close to home and has become moody.
I know this is a site for those who are trying to stay sober but please tell me how to help my daughter. I rarely say anything but when I do it just seems to separate us further.
I hope you will consider posting this so your readers can advise me. Thanks!